heartsick

When Jamie told me late, late Friday night that a helicopter had just gone done and roughly 30 US troops were lost, my heart instantly shattered. I begged him for details, but it had literally just happened within a couple hours and families had not even started to be notified yet. All he could say was that “it’ll be on the news by the morning.”

Jamie tried to continue with lighter conversation, but my whole body physically ached knowing that while I would sleep that night 30 people would receive the knock on the door. A knock that I truly cannot even wrap my brain around receiving. Here I am, talking to my husband, hearing his sweet voice, and there are people tonight who have no idea the news they are about to receive. It really hurt me.


Here’s the part that makes me so upset –


So many people naturally just hear a number. Oh my gosh, 31 died. That’s so sad. But if it was only, say, 30 that died, that would mean the world and more to that one family whose soldier survived. Do you see what I mean?


Every. single. soldier that we lose in this war means another spouse who will forever have that hole in his/her heart. More children who will grow up without their father or mother. Parents who should never have to bury their child. It just makes me sick to my stomach just how many children (I’m sure at least 50) who will not have their father at their graduations, weddings, and to see their future children.


We’ll naturally “forget” about this one tragic incident as time goes on, but the loved ones left behind won’t.


Don’t get me wrong – I support my husband, his missions, and every single troop that is risking his or her life daily so that we Americans don’t have to live in fear of another 9/11. So that we can enjoy our vacations, our shopping trips, our workouts, our lazy days without fear of random attack. I just wish so badly that the world didn’t have to be like this. That people in the Taliban didn’t have the hatred in their hearts to needlessly ruin Americans lives.


I know there are so many stories every day about the war, but it is so real. Please keep the troops in your honest prayers.


Is it time for them to come home yet?